Worst movies/TV shows that never existed

[JCC the Alt Historian]

The CW'S Powerpuff

The CW's live action reboot of the classic Cartoon Network show The Powerpuff Girls.

With how poorly received the script to the pilot was, it can be assumed that the full show would've probably been terrible.

 

[MegaToon1234]

Iron Man (2008)

Whose idea was it to cast Jack Black as Tony Stark? Why not get Robert Downey Jr.?

No wonder the film flopped so hard. No one could ever take that film seriously. If they taken the movie seriously (and casted Robert Downey Jr. as Tony Stark), they might have turn the Marvel comics into a series of movies. Although there is a rumor of that happening, but due to the failure of Iron Man, it never came to fruition.

 

[MrCarioca]

Iron Man (2008)

Whose idea was it to cast Jack Black as Tony Stark? Why not get Robert Downey Jr.?

No wonder the film flopped so hard. No one could ever take that film seriously. If they taken the movie seriously (and casted Robert Downey Jr. as Tony Stark, they might have turn the Marvel comics into a series of movies. Although there is a rumor of that happening, but due to the failure of Iron Man, it never came to fruition.

Unironically I might watch Jack Black as Iron Man

 

[Ashley Pomeroy]

I realise this is for imaginary films and TV shows, but I'm still traumatised by Massiv' (1998), which was the BBC's attempt to cash in on the jungle / drum and bass boom of the mid 1990s. It starred Goldie, a couple of years before he was in The World is Not Enough, although in practice the actual lead actors were Phil Daniels and Matt Lucas. Infamously the theme tune was by... Damon Albarn, presumably because no-one at the BBC actually knew any drum and bass artists.

Apparently the writing wasn't bad - it was devised by Murray Smith, seemingly from scripts he had left over from The Paradise Club - but the tone veered all over the place. It was a kind of comedy detective show without any jokes. The cast felt completely wrong, Goldie himself had a painfully limited range, drum and bass wasn't nearly as popular in 1998 as it had been in 1995, and of course it had the misfortune to begin broadcasting two weeks before Ali G first appeared in The 11 O'Clock Show.

On account of all the music used in the show it was never repeated and has never been released on DVD. A couple of episodes are or were up on Vimeo.

I was going to say "it has the rare distinction of never having been repeated or released on DVD" but looking at Wikipedia's list I'm surprised at how common that is:

Category:1998 British television series debuts - Wikipedia

en.wikipedia.org

Undercover Heart? Comin' Atcha'? Ultraviolet? Maisie Raine? I was alive back then but I can't remember anything about them... except that Ultraviolet had something to do with vampires. Oh, and Stressed Eric, I remember that. It was Britain's answer to The Simpsons, but better! Because it was British, and edgy. So much better that it lasted thirteen episodes. Because it was so good.

 

[CaptainCalvert]

Well done to Ashley Pomeroy for conjuring up a horror that could easily be haunting us and the BBC now and evermore.

I like the idea of Damon Albarn doing the title music - it's the kind of dumb mistake all too easily made by the grown ups of big organisations [1] who think they're down with the kids.


[1] The BBC in the late 90s was still quite good musically and had a fair bit of D and B on Radio 1 in late evening shows, including (from memory) at least one show or segment specifically covering it, so they knew artists and had contacts. Using Albarn is most likely down to either lack of imagination or risk aversion among the grown ups

 

[MrCarioca]

The Family Guy Movie (2019)

Director: Seth MacFarlane

Release Date:November 15th 2019

This film was made to celebrate "Family Guy"'s 20th anniversary. Initially having a script similar to that of "Ted" and "Ted 2", it was decided to have the film revolve around the everyday antics of the Griffins, with a very loose plotline tying everything together. Animationwise, its quality is akin to that of the "Family Guy" show, nothing much stands out here compared to what we see on TV. Storywise, the loose plotline follows Peter Griffin trying to become a better man by pursing multiple jobs and failing. These include an actor, a construction worker and a bartender at the Drunken Clam. Meanwhile Stewie develops a new device to get rid of Lois once and for all, only to be stopped by Brian who secretly wants to do... stuff with Lois to put it lightly.

Needless to say, the film was a disaster and bombed horrendously at the box office. The film felt like multiple "Family Guy" episodes haphazardly stitched together, without a clear narrative and a theme. The constant cutaways was also a major criticism, most of which aren't funny. "Family Guy" would end up cancelled by 2020, this time for good.

 

[oshron]

The Family Guy Movie (2019)

Director: Seth MacFarlane

Release Date:November 15th 2019

This film was made to celebrate "Family Guy"'s 20th anniversary. Initially having a script similar to that of "Ted" and "Ted 2", it was decided to have the film revolve around the everyday antics of the Griffins, with a very loose plotline tying everything together. Animationwise, its quality is akin to that of the "Family Guy" show, nothing much stands out here compared to what we see on TV. Storywise, the loose plotline follows Peter Griffin trying to become a better man by pursing multiple jobs and failing. These include an actor, a construction worker and a bartender at the Drunken Clam. Meanwhile Stewie develops a new device to get rid of Lois once and for all, only to be stopped by Brian who secretly wants to do... stuff with Lois to put it lightly.

Needless to say, the film was a disaster and bombed horrendously at the box office. The film felt like multiple "Family Guy" episodes haphazardly stitched together, without a clear narrative and a theme. The constant cutaways was also a major criticism, most of which aren't funny. "Family Guy" would end up cancelled by 2020, this time for good.

ahh, if only...

 

[CaptainCalvert]

Adolf's Art Class
Der Fùhrer himself shows his devoted followers how to paint the aryan way.
You too can learn how to better produce sensible motivational paintings depicting the highlights of a pureblood lifestyle or the depravities of lesser races. This show combines practical brushwork with inspirational commentaries from der Fuhrer himself.
What better way to relax and learn for an hour before watching Himmler's House Calls (in which deviants are carted away during a visit by Onkel Heinrich himself? ).

And yes, I'd rather watch the Best TV never made version I posted earlier..

 

[Mad Bad Rabbit]

Adolf's Art Class
Der Fùhrer himself shows his devoted followers how to paint the aryan way.

Strength Through The Joy of Painting

"Now let us take ze alizarin crimson, und add some happy swastikas..."

 

[THE KINGFISH]

This isn’t awful per se, but it could be considered “too ahead of its time”……

---

Hazbin Hotel (1979)

Hazbin Hotel is an American adult animated musical horror comedy series created by Ralph Bakshi and Andy Warhol serving as executive producer. The series aired only one episode (partially on some affiliates in Middle America and the Deep South) on NBC on October 31, 1979 for reasons that we are about to get into.

The series is set in a “comedic” interpretation of Hell in which sinners are routinely exterminated to prevent overpopulation. The Dark Princess of Hell - Charlie Morningstar - responds to this by establishing a rehabilitation hotel and clinic to redeem sinners into Heaven as an alternative. All the while, copious off-color humor, edgy musical numbers, excessive swearing (swearing that would make even George Carlin blush with its liberal use of ‘fuck’, ‘shit’, and ‘cock’) and prominent homosexual and transgender representation (the earliest non-stereotypical depiction in any Western cartoon by far and wide).

In its one and only airing on broadcast television that night, NBC telephone lines went red hot with viewer complaints about how offensive and tasteless the content they were viewing. Some affiliates stopped the broadcast as it was airing, replacing it with either reruns of shows such as Davey and Goliath and Little House on the Prairie, or (in many Deep South affiliates) a preacher in the newsroom reading biblical sermons and prayers to viewers. NBC was eventually forced to cut off the episode 5 minutes before the end due to the FCC threatening via telephone to revoke the broadcast license to every NBC station if it continued. The one and only episode aired received extremely low ratings and critical condemnation for its extreme vulgarity and “desecration” of religious values. Scathing reviews included remarks such as “the last dying breath of the 1960s hippies”, or “if Springtime for Hitler had bombed just like Bialystock and Bloom had hoped”, or “Walt Disney meets the Manson family.” This wasn’t helped by the show’s admittedly-beautiful Disney-esque animation confusing families into thinking it was for all ages.

The show’s massive failure would lead to a chilling effect on the television industry. By 1981, the incoming Rumsfeld presidential administration would create the Bureau of Appropriate Media to ensure that films and television shows would be “aligned with patriotism and family values” to ensure that nothing like Hazbin Hotel would ever be made again.

Yet, in the 40 years since its airing - and after the show in its entirety became available online - there has been retrospective acclaim of the show for being “ahead of its time” and perfectly foreshadowing the misery of 1980s America.

 

[Sekhmet_D]

This isn’t awful per se, but it could be considered “too ahead of its time”……

---

Hazbin Hotel (1979)

Warhol's involvement is surprising. The way you described it, the project sounds more like a Bakshi/John Waters collab lol.

The 'best movies' thread could use an 80s version helmed by Tim Burton.

 

[Sekhmet_D]

Adolf's Art Class
Der Fùhrer himself shows his devoted followers how to paint the aryan way.
You too can learn how to better produce sensible motivational paintings depicting the highlights of a pureblood lifestyle or the depravities of lesser races. This show combines practical brushwork with inspirational commentaries from der Fuhrer himself.
What better way to relax and learn for an hour before watching Himmler's House Calls (in which deviants are carted away during a visit by Onkel Heinrich himself? ).

And yes, I'd rather watch the Best TV never made version I posted earlier..

Art Attack? More like Art Blitzkrieg.

 

[Otakuninja2006]

This isn’t awful per se, but it could be considered “too ahead of its time”……

---

Hazbin Hotel (1979)

Hazbin Hotel is an American adult animated musical horror comedy series created by Ralph Bakshi and Andy Warhol serving as executive producer. The series aired only one episode (partially on some affiliates in Middle America and the Deep South) on NBC on October 31, 1979 for reasons that we are about to get into.

The series is set in a “comedic” interpretation of Hell in which sinners are routinely exterminated to prevent overpopulation. The Dark Princess of Hell - Charlie Morningstar - responds to this by establishing a rehabilitation hotel and clinic to redeem sinners into Heaven as an alternative. All the while, copious off-color humor, edgy musical numbers, excessive swearing (swearing that would make even George Carlin blush with its liberal use of ‘fuck’, ‘shit’, and ‘cock’) and prominent homosexual and transgender representation (the earliest non-stereotypical depiction in any Western cartoon by far and wide).

In its one and only airing on broadcast television that night, NBC telephone lines went red hot with viewer complaints about how offensive and tasteless the content they were viewing. Some affiliates stopped the broadcast as it was airing, replacing it with either reruns of shows such as Davey and Goliath and Little House on the Prairie, or (in many Deep South affiliates) a preacher in the newsroom reading biblical sermons and prayers to viewers. NBC was eventually forced to cut off the episode 5 minutes before the end due to the FCC threatening via telephone to revoke the broadcast license to every NBC station if it continued. The one and only episode aired received extremely low ratings and critical condemnation for its extreme vulgarity and “desecration” of religious values. Scathing reviews included remarks such as “the last dying breath of the 1960s hippies”, or “if Springtime for Hitler had bombed just like Bialystock and Bloom had hoped”, or “Walt Disney meets the Manson family.” This wasn’t helped by the show’s admittedly-beautiful Disney-esque animation confusing families into thinking it was for all ages.

The show’s massive failure would lead to a chilling effect on the television industry. By 1981, the incoming Rumsfeld presidential administration would create the Bureau of Appropriate Media to ensure that films and television shows would be “aligned with patriotism and family values” to ensure that nothing like Hazbin Hotel would ever be made again.

Yet, in the 40 years since its airing - and after the show in its entirety became available online - there has been retrospective acclaim of the show for being “ahead of its time” and perfectly foreshadowing the misery of 1980s America.

..................

Wow. I'm just shocked. Preachers reading sermons. The feds threatening to kill not only NBC, but also EVERY STATION THAT WAS AFFILATED WITH IT.....

Not to mention the 80s becoming a worse decade than even IOTL......

Damn.

 

[THE KINGFISH]

..................

Wow. I'm just shocked. Preachers reading sermons. The feds threatening to kill not only NBC, but also EVERY STATION THAT WAS AFFILATED WITH IT.....

Not to mention the 80s becoming a worse decade than even IOTL......

Damn.

I just thought about how it would be interesting to see something like Hazbin Hotel or Helluva Boss made on the eve of the Reagan era (or should I say the Rumsfeld era) and how 1970s America would react to it differently than 2020s America.

 

[Otakuninja2006]

I just thought about how it would be interesting to see something like Hazbin Hotel or Helluva Boss made on the eve of the Reagan era (or should I say the Rumsfeld era) and how 1970s America would react to it differently than 2020s America.

oh.....but how would 80s America be miserable in your TL?

 

[JCC the Alt Historian]

This isn’t awful per se, but it could be considered “too ahead of its time”……

---

Hazbin Hotel (1979)

Hazbin Hotel is an American adult animated musical horror comedy series created by Ralph Bakshi and Andy Warhol serving as executive producer. The series aired only one episode (partially on some affiliates in Middle America and the Deep South) on NBC on October 31, 1979 for reasons that we are about to get into.

The series is set in a “comedic” interpretation of Hell in which sinners are routinely exterminated to prevent overpopulation. The Dark Princess of Hell - Charlie Morningstar - responds to this by establishing a rehabilitation hotel and clinic to redeem sinners into Heaven as an alternative. All the while, copious off-color humor, edgy musical numbers, excessive swearing (swearing that would make even George Carlin blush with its liberal use of ‘fuck’, ‘shit’, and ‘cock’) and prominent homosexual and transgender representation (the earliest non-stereotypical depiction in any Western cartoon by far and wide).

In its one and only airing on broadcast television that night, NBC telephone lines went red hot with viewer complaints about how offensive and tasteless the content they were viewing. Some affiliates stopped the broadcast as it was airing, replacing it with either reruns of shows such as Davey and Goliath and Little House on the Prairie, or (in many Deep South affiliates) a preacher in the newsroom reading biblical sermons and prayers to viewers. NBC was eventually forced to cut off the episode 5 minutes before the end due to the FCC threatening via telephone to revoke the broadcast license to every NBC station if it continued. The one and only episode aired received extremely low ratings and critical condemnation for its extreme vulgarity and “desecration” of religious values. Scathing reviews included remarks such as “the last dying breath of the 1960s hippies”, or “if Springtime for Hitler had bombed just like Bialystock and Bloom had hoped”, or “Walt Disney meets the Manson family.” This wasn’t helped by the show’s admittedly-beautiful Disney-esque animation confusing families into thinking it was for all ages.

The show’s massive failure would lead to a chilling effect on the television industry. By 1981, the incoming Rumsfeld presidential administration would create the Bureau of Appropriate Media to ensure that films and television shows would be “aligned with patriotism and family values” to ensure that nothing like Hazbin Hotel would ever be made again.

Yet, in the 40 years since its airing - and after the show in its entirety became available online - there has been retrospective acclaim of the show for being “ahead of its time” and perfectly foreshadowing the misery of 1980s America.

Wouldn't the swearing get bleeped out though?

 

[THE KINGFISH]

oh.....but how would 80s America be miserable in your TL?

It’s not for a full TL but rather a one shot set in the universe of Fear, Loathing and Gumbo on the Campaign Trail ‘72 - a TL that details a worse 1970s and a dystopian 1980s.

Wouldn't the swearing get bleeped out though?

Yeah, I went too far on that one.

 

[MrCarioca]

This isn’t awful per se, but it could be considered “too ahead of its time”……

---

Hazbin Hotel (1979)

Hazbin Hotel is an American adult animated musical horror comedy series created by Ralph Bakshi and Andy Warhol serving as executive producer. The series aired only one episode (partially on some affiliates in Middle America and the Deep South) on NBC on October 31, 1979 for reasons that we are about to get into.

The series is set in a “comedic” interpretation of Hell in which sinners are routinely exterminated to prevent overpopulation. The Dark Princess of Hell - Charlie Morningstar - responds to this by establishing a rehabilitation hotel and clinic to redeem sinners into Heaven as an alternative. All the while, copious off-color humor, edgy musical numbers, excessive swearing (swearing that would make even George Carlin blush with its liberal use of ‘fuck’, ‘shit’, and ‘cock’) and prominent homosexual and transgender representation (the earliest non-stereotypical depiction in any Western cartoon by far and wide).

In its one and only airing on broadcast television that night, NBC telephone lines went red hot with viewer complaints about how offensive and tasteless the content they were viewing. Some affiliates stopped the broadcast as it was airing, replacing it with either reruns of shows such as Davey and Goliath and Little House on the Prairie, or (in many Deep South affiliates) a preacher in the newsroom reading biblical sermons and prayers to viewers. NBC was eventually forced to cut off the episode 5 minutes before the end due to the FCC threatening via telephone to revoke the broadcast license to every NBC station if it continued. The one and only episode aired received extremely low ratings and critical condemnation for its extreme vulgarity and “desecration” of religious values. Scathing reviews included remarks such as “the last dying breath of the 1960s hippies”, or “if Springtime for Hitler had bombed just like Bialystock and Bloom had hoped”, or “Walt Disney meets the Manson family.” This wasn’t helped by the show’s admittedly-beautiful Disney-esque animation confusing families into thinking it was for all ages.

The show’s massive failure would lead to a chilling effect on the television industry. By 1981, the incoming Rumsfeld presidential administration would create the Bureau of Appropriate Media to ensure that films and television shows would be “aligned with patriotism and family values” to ensure that nothing like Hazbin Hotel would ever be made again.

Yet, in the 40 years since its airing - and after the show in its entirety became available online - there has been retrospective acclaim of the show for being “ahead of its time” and perfectly foreshadowing the misery of 1980s America.

This gives me some ideas...

 

[SomeGuyOnline]

Total Drama Island (2023)

Designed to be an "in-universe reboot" of the series, the season is set 15 years after the events of the first season, and features an all-new set of characters competing on Wawanakwa Island for $1 million.

The first official season of Total Drama to be made in nearly a decade (not counting the spin-offs Ridonculous Race or Total Dramarama), it already faced criticism from fans pre-release for it's complete lack of marketing and slow production (with the season first being announced in early 2021 and no further info being released until the end of 2022), and the last-minute recasting of Chris' VA didn't help either.

When the season was first released, it was heavily criticized for a multitude of reasons: the new cast of teens being depicted as complete Gen Z stereotypes with little to no individual development, lots of unnecessary forced Gen Z slang (such as "slay", "cringe", and "sus") and pop culture references (such as TikTok and Taylor Swift), poorly written eliminations and a bad elimination order (with all the least hated characters being eliminated pre-merge), and completely removing the show's original edgy teen humor, in lieu of much more kid-friendly, Total Dramarama-style humor. The challenges were nitpicked for being too "weak" compared to that in the rest of the seasons, several plot points were quickly brought up out of nowhere and then dropped, and the winner was slammed by many for a multitude of reasons, including "floating", "getting no character development throughout the season", and "having no plot relevance whatsoever". The poor reception to the season was so bad that Terry McGurrin (one of the season's executive producers) deleted his Instagram account to avoid the backlash, nearly all of the character's VAs received death threats and were doxxed online, forcing them to delete their social media accounts as well, and a second season, which was then in the works, was pulled from it's release date at the last-minute despite being nearly completed and was shelved.

 

[CrashBandicam]

The Family Guy Movie (2019)

Director: Seth MacFarlane

Release Date:November 15th 2019

This film was made to celebrate "Family Guy"'s 20th anniversary. Initially having a script similar to that of "Ted" and "Ted 2", it was decided to have the film revolve around the everyday antics of the Griffins, with a very loose plotline tying everything together. Animationwise, its quality is akin to that of the "Family Guy" show, nothing much stands out here compared to what we see on TV. Storywise, the loose plotline follows Peter Griffin trying to become a better man by pursing multiple jobs and failing. These include an actor, a construction worker and a bartender at the Drunken Clam. Meanwhile Stewie develops a new device to get rid of Lois once and for all, only to be stopped by Brian who secretly wants to do... stuff with Lois to put it lightly.

Needless to say, the film was a disaster and bombed horrendously at the box office. The film felt like multiple "Family Guy" episodes haphazardly stitched together, without a clear narrative and a theme. The constant cutaways was also a major criticism, most of which aren't funny. "Family Guy" would end up cancelled by 2020, this time for good.

So did the critical and box office failure of The Family Guy Movie also cut into the TV ratings for Family Guy, which I'm guessing is the reason it got (seemingly permanently) cancelled for a second time ITTL? Ouch.