The timeline of God

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This should be included in a tutorial or something on how not to make a timeline.
And I love how Islam conquers all under the leadership of extremely secular Ataturk.
Also, the :D smilie after the nuking of several cities is just... wrong.
 
No, they're not the muslim motherland. kissem Saudi, they're a bunch of minafqeen wa sharameet. Khizat masari il petrol.

ok, let me be more specific saudi arabia is where Mecca is located which happens to be the most important city in the muslim world. I didn't mean to offend anybody, I was just having fun with the idiocy :rolleyes:.
 

Keenir

Banned
don't be surprised that they think Einstein is a Turk in this ATL - Ataturk once told the ambassador from England "you are a Turk" because the ambassador's name started with a Turkish word.

Turkish techwank?

I remember being told that, if Turkey had taken part in the space race with the US and USSR, the Turks wouldn't need to build rockets - they'd use their expertise with cement and make a giant ladder/tower to Low Earth Orbit.
 
You guys all do realize this guy was not a Muslim, right? Just another northern European Islamophobe troll. Even after Ian pointed it out, some of you went on for two more pages. His name doesn't even make sense: It's "Abu Karim Muhammad Al". He probably copied from somewhere and ran out of room and thought nobody would notice.

Hash? That didn't raise any suspicions?
 

Hashasheen

Banned
You guys all do realize this guy was not a Muslim, right? Just another northern European Islamophobe troll. Even after Ian pointed it out, some of you went on for two more pages. His name doesn't even make sense: It's "Abu Karim Muhammad Al". He probably copied from somewhere and ran out of room and thought nobody would notice.

Hash? That didn't raise any suspicions?
Thought it was an African-American convert.:eek:
 

Ibn Warraq

Banned
You guys all do realize this guy was not a Muslim, right? Just another northern European Islamophobe troll. Even after Ian pointed it out, some of you went on for two more pages. His name doesn't even make sense: It's "Abu Karim Muhammad Al". He probably copied from somewhere and ran out of room and thought nobody would notice.

Hash? That didn't raise any suspicions?

Well, I can't read Arabic so that meant nothing to me, but this part here nearly made me piss myself laughing.

1938: USA, Britain and nazi Germany all acquire nuclear weapons. The nuclear war enters it's final stage, as A-bombs are dropped on Constantinople, Ankara, Damascus, Cairo, Jerusalem, Alexandria, Tunis, Sofia, Smyrna, Baghdad, Teheran, Medina, Mecca, Kabul and Islamabad. Enemy soldiers swarm over muslims lands, soiling it in the process.
(bolded emph. mine)

Somehow I think a dedicated Islamicist, particularly a Turkophile one, would have referred to Istanbul not Constantinople, regardless of what the song says.

That being said, even without learning he was posting from Iceland and his choice in names, I think it was pretty obvious he wasn't Muslim.
 
You guys all do realize this guy was not a Muslim, right? Just another northern European Islamophobe troll. Even after Ian pointed it out, some of you went on for two more pages. His name doesn't even make sense: It's "Abu Karim Muhammad Al". He probably copied from somewhere and ran out of room and thought nobody would notice.

Hash? That didn't raise any suspicions?

Of course we do - let's have our fun!
Even our native Middle Eastern stock doesn't use arabic for User name only!
 
I think a stupidest TL eva 11!1! award would make more actual normal and non troll ppl start stupid TLs which would suck.
Since the guy who made this just posted and bugged off, just close the thread and let it fade into mediocrity.

Or, for more fun, change the title into 'Rant against Trolls' and throw it into non-political chat...
 
In this timeline i'll answer what would have happend if Turkish scientist had made an atom bomb in 1930. If anyone could have made it this early, it would have been the Turks.:)
1932: The Turks send a secret agent to steal Einstein. They find out that he's really a Turk and a muslim.
1933: Turkish scientists finish developing an atom bomb. They try it out on Athens. The city gets destroyed and Greece is incorporated into Turkey once again as the terrified population of Greece surrenders.
1934: most of the Balkans south of the Danube is forced to join the growing empire of the Turks. The western powers have to surrender the arab world to the turks. Everyone who lives in areas conquered by Turkish forces is forced to convert to Islam. The punishment for refusing is death.:mad:
Over 1000 A-bombs are made. As the muslim world, from Marocco to Indus, is united under Turkey the world trembles in fear. :D
1935: Turkey starts threatening western Europe, and conquers Georgia, Rumenia and most of Hungary.:cool:
1936: Nazi Germany, Italy,France, Spain, Britain, Poland, The Soviet Union, Japan and the USA form an alliance against Turkey.
The Turks answer by destorying Paris, Berlin, London, Moscow, Rome, Tokyo and Washington with nuclear weapons.
Everyone in the western world starts hating and fearing the awesome might of Turkey. A large Turkish army conquers Italy, while Milan, Florence, Naples and Venice are destroyed with nuclear weapons.:D
1937: As 30 more cities around the world get destroyed in the nuclear onslaught, the states of the world start ignoring Turkey's nuclear threats, and start sending countless soldiers to the frontlines. As the turkish army is quickly pushed back on the frontlines, the Turkish officials become frantic and start using nuclear weapons at the frontlines.:rolleyes:
1938: USA, Britain and nazi Germany all acquire nuclear weapons. The nuclear war enters it's final stage, as A-bombs are dropped on Constantinople, Ankara, Damascus, Cairo, Jerusalem, Alexandria, Tunis, Sofia, Smyrna, Baghdad, Teheran, Medina, Mecca, Kabul and Islamabad.:( Enemy soldiers swarm over muslims lands, soiling it in the process.:eek:
1939: Muhammad (peace be upon him), the beloved prophet, returns from heaven, and takes command of the remnants of the Turkish-muslim empire. He summons more A-bombs, and under his command the Turks mangage to exterminate every non muslim man on Earth. Women and children are not held responsible, however, and Jesus convinces them that he is NOT the son of god, and that Muhammad the wise is really the greatest prophet. Then Muhammad the great rebuilds Mecca in 6 days, with his friend Jesus.
Muhammad is wise, Muhammed is merciful. Muhammad convinces God to shorten the sentence of the unbelievers in hell, from eternity to a mere hundred million years, and thus this alternate timeline comes to an end.:)
1940:

This belongs in somewhere more mad than the ASB thread, I hope you're joking when you wrote this :p
 
Infidel! Troll! You no true Turk! Shows: The western powers have to surrender the arab world to the turks.There no thing like Arab. :eek: Is Sandturk! :D And why only 1.000 nukular bomb? In 1 year Turkey could build 10.000 nukular bomb from mighty Ataturk hands alone!
Have question: Nukular bomb built from urine. Must be urine from Muslim men? Or is working also urine from goats? :confused: Then Turkey can make more 10.000 bomb! :D
 
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