Famous quotations that never were

[metalstar316]

"MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!! " -Barack Obama's Inaugural address

[metalstar316]

"I did not have sexual relations with that woman, Miss Lewinsky. Seriously, she's so ugly I wouldn't touch her with Stephanopoulous' cock. Would you? I have standards, you know." -Bill Clinton.

[alt_historian]

Originally Posted by metalstar316

"MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!! " -Barack Obama's Inaugural address

fillerston

[mattep74]

"I herby announce my candidacy for the 2012 presidential election"

Sarah Palin during McCains consesion speach


"Cant you wait until all votes are counted atleast" Every american watching TV and getting tired of hearing about the election for over a year

[a Person]

"Wait... You don't have beer?" - George W. Bush walks into a meeting of the American Bar Association

"I am very happy to win the 1996 presidential erection-- wait, what did I just say? I meant election, ELECTION, you hear me?" - Bill Clinton, in his acceptance speech. This is what caused him to be impeached before he was even inaugurated.

[Vault-Scope]

George Bush Augusty 2008 to saakavilich begin for usian intervention:
"Are you kidding me?? Do I look like rambo to you?!? Go to hell, you ****! Why the hell would you even think WE would support YOU?
We only said we wanted you to support US, not the other way around, we even paid you for it damnit!
(listening)
No. I´m pretty sure that I don´t give a damn about that #@$%& you have for a country, even if putin used nukes. Why are you even insisting? Are trying to be some sort of a***-h*** with me? Our only trouble with this whole affair is that it is the Russians, not us, who are doing it!

Have a nice day,"

[Berra]

"It looks like hurrican Katarina will hit Crawford, Texas."
- NOAA press release

[Flush]

"I would like to take this opportunity to tell the American people that I have indeed relations with William Ayers, Tony Rezko, Saul Alinksy, Rasheid Kalidi, and any other associations that I may have been accused of having. I have also been in kahoots with ACORN. I am very sorry --- I apologize --- and hand over the Presidency to my Vice President Elect, Joseph Biden."

---President-Elect Barack Obama

[Wolfhound]

"Bush drums up, another read scare
Denys us Universal Health care"
B-O-B African-American Rapper in his song That Bitch in the White House

[aktarian]

"Sarah Palin may have bagged an elk or two but I'm going bear hunting" Barrack Obama before meeting with russian president Dmitrij Medvedev

[sunsurf]

Originally Posted by Zyzzyva;2039174-

"Oh, like I'm going to concede. Kill, my minions! Kill them all!"

Senator John McCain, November 3rd, 2008

Just remove the comma...

"Kill my minions! Kill them all!"



"I did not have improper sexual relations with Mr. Clinton.
. --President Monica Lewinski.


"Hey, how come nobody ever remembers us??"
. --every other woman Clinton ever made a pass at.

[ColeMercury]

"I am a Whig, a black, dyed in the wool Whig, and I never intend to belong to any other party than the party of freedom and progress."
- Frederick Douglass.

[aktarian]

"Between his vodka and my marijuana we had a blast" Bill Clinton when asked about his impressions after his first meeting with Boris Jeltsin

[mattep74]

"Whats the point of going on, we dont have any players anymore. And the remaining team agrees. The fotballteam is herby disbanded"

Schoolboard at Marshall University

I think i have seen We are Marshall to much

[Dathi THorfinnsson]

Originally Posted by aktarian

"Sarah Palin may have bagged an elk or two but I'm going bear hunting" Barrack Obama before meeting with russian president Dmitrij Medvedev

Doubly appropriate - Russian Bear, and "Medved"=Bear's son

[Berra]

"Rule Britannia
Brittons never ever shall behave"
- Da Queen

"I admit, I'm really a lizzard."
- Da Queen

[aktarian]

"Invade Afghanistan? Are you crazy? Need I remind you that since Alexander the Great nobody conqured that country? And whatever I am I'm no Alexander. I think it's time we tighten the rules about drinking vodka in Red Army operations department. I mean, seriously people." Leonid Breznev, 1978

[RCTFI]

“God only knows what will be the final result of what it is that we are doing. And, unfortunately, our endeavors seem not to be of sufficient importance for Him to descend unto the Earth in a pillar of flame and let us know what the outcome of this adventure will be.” - Emperor Aleksander II, on the Sicilian Expedition


"Disaster has plagues us, misfortune has dogged us, God has cursed us, the very earth of this foul land has fought against us, and General Mikhailov has led us." - Unknown soldier, in summary of the Sicilian Campaign.

"We set upon them in the instant at which they began to make landfall. Their ranks were in disorder, and their cavalry had yet to bring its horses ashore. No sooner had the first of their soldiers set their feet upon the earth of our sacred fatherland, than we made them pay for that affront with blood. Thrown spears and arrows shot from bows began their schooling; we concluded their lessons with a massed charge into their disordered ranks." - The Sicilian Chronicles, commissioned by the King of Sicily to record his great victory.

"Perhaps in retrospect my decision to invade was made with undue haste." - Emperor Aleksander II to the King of Sicily, after having been captured during the fighting.

[Berra]

"There is nothing as useless as a good theory."

"The most important thing in my life, its leitmotif, has been the constant and close contacts prostitutes."

"One sits the whole day at the desk and appetite is standing next to me. "Away with you," I say. But Comrade Appetite does not budge from the spot."

All by Leonid Brezhnev, the last one was good so I didn't edit it.

[Chris Oakley]

"For Those About To Dunk, We Salute You"

--Hit single by heavy metal band(and hardcore NBA fans) AC/DC