TBH, the Polish population and elites considered the Austrians to be less oppressive because they were less powerful. Germany and Russia were close to be superpowers while Austria was a great diplomatical and cultural power, but its army and economy were rather weak. When you consider the UK, France, Russia, Germay, Austria is clearly the last power on the list. Also, Germany had the historical heartland of Poland within its borders while Russia occupied the largest and most populous part of the nation, while Austria had Galicia, rather poor and unimportant AFAIK if not for Cracow. In Italy, Austria was the only 'oppressor', so it's not at all the same context as in Poland.
As for the Duchy of Warsaw, there is virtually no chance to see an independent Poland having good relationships with Russia in the 19th century context. If you talk about autonomy, sure it would have helped greatly, but if nationalism is too strong in Poland, then it could create more problems for the Russians and leads to indenpendence. That's why Russia finally decided to oppress the Polish OTL, it was too risky for their inetrests.